Someday...

OK so I know I haven't posted in awhile, but I'm going to start making it a priority. I don't know that too many people stop by my blog, but I would like to keep a better record of the ins and outs of "Freeman life", if you will.

So where do I start??

I've been very reflective the past few weeks. Reflecting on my life up to now, my husband, my marriage, my children, my parents, brothers, in-laws (my second family), and the events that have somewhat shaped me up to now. 2008 has been a crazy roller coaster ride of emotions for me and my family. I found out in February I had a hole in my heart, I lost an Aunt in March (which I think left a bigger hole), I had surgery in May, Emma turned "one", Luke graduated 5th grade, Kyle has shot up like a weed, Ron and I will be married 12 years this month and then we turn 30 in November. Good grief!

One of the major things I've been reflecting on lately is my family. For those of you who don't know, I have the best family in the world. I'm not just talking about my parents and brothers and Ron's family. I mean my Aunts and Uncles. My Grandma and my Cousins. They rock. In fact Ron even says they took him in and made him one them. Growing up I may not have had much, but I had them. We all had each other. I think that's why this year has been especially hard. We lost one and it hurts. It hurts so bad that I don't think I can go an hour or less without thinking about Her. I think about that day all the time. The day we, as a family, became broken. I have a picture on my cell phone of Emma playing in the living room and everything was how it should be. But then, in one minute, in one phone call, everything around you can shatter into a million pieces.

I want to know why.
Why now?
Why Her?

Someday is the answer I get. Someday you'll know. Someday it won't matter. Someday you'll see Her again. I know. But it still hurts. It hurts me for Her mother, Her children, Her grandchildren, Her sisters and brothers, and Her nieces and nephews.

I wish we could all live close, like when I was younger. I want to see them everyday. I want to play with Aunt Dawn, Jessica and Marla (the girls). I want to race Josh, Matt and Erick (the boys) in the back yard. I want to eat at the ironing board again. I want to go back, just for one day. To see Andrew and Robyn when they were about the same size. I want to take all of them and lock them away so nothing like this will ever happen again. I want them all to know that I think about them everyday. Not just some of them but ALL of them. I don't want any of them to ever doubt how much they mean to me and to this family. So for my family who reads this, I love you. More than you'll ever know, I love you. My memories with you are some of the greatest times in my life. So in memory of Aunt Darla, I want to tell everyone I miss you, I love you and I can't wait to see you again. Oh and thanks for being the best family in the world. You guys rock my socks off!

Happy Birthday Emma!

Emma turned "1" on May 23rd, so we had to throw her a party Freeman style. We ordered a fantabulous cake, made a boat load of food, and invited tons of friends and family. I must say as far as parties go, Emma had one of the best first birthdays I've ever seen. I will also say that I was so busy trying to entertain that I did not get many pictures. Here are a few I managed to get.
Here is Emma's 1st Birthday Cake! It came from a really cool bakery in Tulsa and was just perfect. It was also really yummy!
This is her very own small version of her cake. She did pretty good eating it. I eventually had to cut it open so she could dig into it. But she didn't freak out because her hands were all goopy which I thought was pretty good, considering both of the boys did that on their first birthdays. This was Emma before the party even started. I guess we wore her out in preparation for the big day!

Having all this fun at this Pink and Brown girly birthday party, reminded me of the day we found out we were having a girl. I had my appointment Jan. 2, 2007 to verify the sex of the baby. I think about this day quite a bit, because, honestly, it was one of the funnest days of my life. We took the boys with us to the appointment that day. As soon as we walked in the man who did the ultrasound said "I bet you want a girl." Boy was that an understatement. I wanted a girl, Ron wanted a girl, Luke and Kyle wanted a girl, my Mom and Kevin, my Dad, Ron's parents, all of our brothers, grandmothers, friends, family, EVERYONE wanted a girl. So of course the appointment started and the guy took forever measuring and doing all the important stuff, my heart was pounding and I couldn't stand it. Finally he said "Well I'm going to tell you what you want to hear." I couldn't believe it. I was crying, shaking and my heart was about to beat out of my chest. All I could say was "Are you sure?" After the appointment, we bought pink carnations to give to my Mom, Ron's Mom and Ron's Grandmother (of course I would have bought a pink carnation for every citizen of Bartlesville that day, but I figured they probably wouldn't be as excited as we were). I'd have to say my Mom's reaction was probably the best. I didn't remind her that day was the day of my ultrasound, just in case it was a girl. I wanted to surprise her. When we walked in she was just, you know, happy to see the boys and had no clue what we had for her. So Ron gave her the carnation and then the funniest thing happened. At first she was like what is this for? And then she just looked at me and started crying. But the funniest part was she said exactly what I said, "Are you sure?" Yeah Mom, I'm pretty sure!

Times-they are a changin...

Well here he is. My boy. My first boy. My love. My heart. My soul. He is such a wonderful blessing. He's growing up and I want it to stop. He is graduating from 5th grade tomorrow and then he's off to middle school. The same middle school I went to. Do you know what happens at middle school? Puberty, new friends, mean kids, girlfriends, and a total disregard for what any adult tries to tell you. I am SO not ready for this. He will be leaving this one behind.

I'm sure Kyle isn't too upset though. He can rule the school now. And as if that isn't enough emotional turmoil, I have this happening too.

She will be "1" on Friday! I can't believe how fast this year has gone by. So let's just recap. One is graduating and moving onto Junior High, the beginning of oh so many wonderful events, that I just can't wait to go through (sigh). The second one will be in 3rd grade and all on his own at his elementary school. Those two have ALWAYS gone to the same school or sitter. And the third is turning one. She's walking everywhere, talking alot, and finally growing some hair! Oh and sleeping all night in her own bed (finally)!! My life seems to be in constant movement and change. I used to want my kids (the boys) to grow quickly so they would get out of all those "baby" phases, but not anymore. Now I want it all to slow down. I feel like it's all going to be over before I know it. I want to enjoy every second (well most of them)!

Holey Heart Surgery, Batman!!

As most of you all know, I had my heart surgery a couple of weeks ago in Dallas. Everything went extremely well and I'm so relieved to have it all taken care of and over with. My surgery went almost perfectly and I have a device in there that is about the size of a quarter. I feel fine though and don't feel the device at all. I want to thank everyone for their thoughts, prayers, cards, phone calls, e-mails and other gifts that helped Ron and I out. God has truly, truly blessed us with a wonderful support system, which is no surprise to me. I've known since the day I found out Luke would be coming, that God would take care of us. I remember praying "God if we're going to go through this, please just let everyone be supportive" and of course they have. Even in highschool when we got married and had Luke, everyone (even the teachers) encouraged us and congratulated us and never made us feel weird or out of place. That's a pretty big deal to me and is something I think about quite often. I tell the boys all the time how lucky they are to not only have an awesome family that loves them to death, but their parent's friends love them and would do anything for them. So I just want all of you to know how much I love you and I appreciate you, even if I don't tell you enough.

A joke for the day.

I thought I would start posting some of the daily things that crack me up. Most of these things come from the mouths of my boys (Ron, Luke and Kyle). They are truly the funniest people I know and if you could only see us in public when they get going, it's quite a sight. I've almost died a couple times from uncontrollabley laughing with food in my mouth and I'm sure most people observing us think we are crazy. (Which we are so who cares what they think.) So I started thinking the other day that I should start writing some of these things down. Of course I forgot what was so funny that day that would make me think that, but I'm sure one night at around 4:36 am it will come flooding back to me. Anyway, to get this long line of what I'm sure will be endless posts started, I thought I would share a joke with everyone that Kyle told us the other day in the car on the way to Tulsa. It went something like this:

Kyle: How many football players does it take to screw in a lightbulb?
Me: I don't know, how many?
Kyle: 100. 1 to hold the lightbulb and 99 to spin the house.
Me: (Unable to speak because I'm hysterically laughing)

Now I know that joke isn't all that funny, but trust me living with an 11 year old and an 8 year old, it was pretty good in comparison. So enjoy your joke of the day and be sure to share it with everyone you know:)

Ok, ok I know I said....

I know I said I would post some pics from Colorado and other stuff soon, and I do intend to do that (as soon as I find my camera cord) but I do have a few pics of Emma ready to go in my phone. So you all get to enjoy! Emma and I had a rough day at work (and school) the other day so we decided to go outside and chill for a bit. Ok so maybe my day was a little worse than Emma's but I'm sure she missed me a bunch, right?? Anyway, I got some cute shots of her checking everything out on the street. She's almost 11 months now and she is growing up way too fast! She's walking and talking and I can't stand how stinking cute she is when she does either one. I will try to get some video up soon of her walking and talking (again I need to find the cord to charge the camera) so you all can check her out. If you can't wait for my disappearing cords to show up and you want to come watch Emma firsthand, give me a call and I'll schedule you an appointment ;)

No Crack in the house!

So I know I haven't posted in awhile, but trust me when I say it has been a crazy past few weeks. To spare you guys from all the drama, I decided to start back fresh with some funny pictures of Emma. I shot these a few weeks ago and I know they aren't the best quality, but I had to act fast to capture the act. Emma was playing with something she wasn't supposed to and when I went to pick her up all I got was an eyeful of booty! I thought it was hysterical! I know I shouldn't put such things on here, but I figured everyone could use a laugh. I'll get some more pics up here soon from our recent trip to Colorado and a few more from here and there.